Emeli Sande's "Our Version of Events": A Review

When I picture the perfect 'yummy mummy' in my head she is always completely up to date with popular culture, including music.  She listens to the coolest singers and can happily converse with a 15 year old on the subject.

When I became a mum I began to neglect music, so when Mumsnet asked me if I'd be interested in reviewing a new album by Emeli Sande I jumped at the chance.  Let's be honest here; I'd never heard of her.  I know I know, that's really poor isn't it.  Some great artists have sung her songs including Tinie Tempah, Cheryl Cole and The Saturdays.  She was writing songs when she was 11 years old, and turned down a record deal in her teens, preferring instead to finish her exams and begin to study medicine.  This is not just an up and coming singer; this is a songwriter that means business.

The album, Our Version of Events, is a well written selection of songs.  I'd pop the CD in the machine and have those tunes happily rolling away whilst I got on with chores, not unpleasant, but not necessarily stopping me in my tracks or forcing my feet to tap.

"Where I Sleep" is my favourite.  In the interests of being useful I tried to understand why I prefer it to others.  I think because the chorus is a quick to learn, set of lyrics that resonated with me; "And I'm sure of nothing that I know. Except this is us, and this is love, and this is where I'm home".  It reminds me of how lucky I am. 

There were other tunes that I felt would be more suited to an angst-ridden teenager, or indeed anyone in the midst of trying to find their 'one true love'.  I can imagine that you could happily wallow with this album on.  Get the wine and ice cream out, chocolate aplenty.

Is it for me?  I don't think I would have bought this myself.  It's music to a stage of life that I've passed, and I personally prefer my tunes to be a little less serious, a little more fun, with a smile and a wink. 

But that's just my opinion.  And I'm not saying there isn't some catchy stuff on there that I keep finding myself singing ("Next to me-e-e-e-e, woo hoo ooo")

I'm really pleased to have been able to listen to some of 'todays' music.  And I'll be trying to turn on that radio more often.  If this is an example of the quality of music around today, then I have a lot of great music to discover! Maybe I'll be one step closer to my imagined idea of a yummy mummy!

Find out more about Emile at www.emelisande.com

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I am a member of the Mumsnet Bloggers Network, a group of parent bloggers picked by Mumsnet to review products, services, events and brands.  I have not paid for the product or to attend an event.  I have editorial control and retain full editorial integrity.

How do I find the time?

Before you have children you have NO IDEA how much time you have at your disposal.  NONE.  You are in complete ignorance.  You wile away the time watching loads of television, socialising with friends, staying up late, getting up late, working whatever hours you like.  You do things; obviously.  But with no real sense of urgency.  No sense that this abundance of time is soon to run out.  You think you have all the time in the world.

And then you have your first child.

The one thing that no-one thinks to tell you; or if they do you are so in the dark you ignore it anyway; is that you will no longer have ANY time.  You think you are going to get a year off on maternity in which you'll start that book you've been promising yourself you'll write, and get on top of the chores, and read the rest of the classics.  You think "how much time can a baby take up? They sleep most of the time don't they?"

Oh my poor luv.  You have NO IDEA.

Since I've had children everyday involves the logistical planning that top military leaders would be proud of.  From ensuring you've washed and ironed all their clothes as well as your own (so they have something to venture outside the house in..... this is the UK you know; it's cold), to ensuring you've not ran out of milk and cereal (you can't just pop around to the corner shop - you have two young children now.  A trip to the local shop will take 2 hours), to making sure they don't have yogurt in their hair, nor chocolate around their mouth.  All this before 8am. (Click here for my tips to ease the morning rush)

Then there are school and nursery runs; or if your baby really is still a baby, you have the delights of the feeding, winding and changing cycle that means you are lucky if you actually get out of your pyjamas before the evening comes around again. (Take-away anyone?)

With all these things to do, and the added pressure of trying to do all this and still, goodness, dare I say it, look 'yummy', it's a wonder we find time to do anything at all for ourselves.

When fellow blogger and supermum extraordinaire ATO mum at Attempting The Ordinary tagged me to take part in a meme about 'finding the time' I had to really start to think about how I do stuff.  So here it goes.

How and when do you find the time to:

Do the Laundry
This is erratic at best in our house.  I have a lovely hubby who helps with this one by throwing a few loads of washing on each weekend, and sometimes mid week, when he sees it building up.  We should probably do a load every day (we have enough washing for that) but we don't.

I then end up having to spend an entire 3 hours in an evening, probably once a week, ironing everything that needs it.  (Definitely not everything.  Click here for my 5 Quick Ironing Tips for Busy Women)
 
Write a blog post
There goes most of the other evenings!  I tend to do this after the children have gone to bed when there's something (sport) on the TV that hubby wants to watch.  I am lucky to sometimes get a free day in the week now when both girls are in school and nursery, and of the 5 hours I get I often spend 2 of them writing.  Oh alright; stop twisting my arm; probably 1 hour actually writing, 2 hours flying around the fabulous land of the Internet, and a quick hour tidying round to make it look like I've been very 'busy'.  (I'm eating lunch or snacking in the other hour.  I knew you'd check if it added up!)

Look after yourself
Who me?  Is that my job too?  Blimey.  It's a tough one, but a lot of it is fulfilled by the time I spend writing (see above).  That time, pounding the words into the keyboard, cuppa slowly going cold beside me, is my time. 

I should probably be sat in a candlelit soap filled bath, reading Jane Eyre and painting my toes.  But really.... I have enough trouble prioritising time to keep my roots recoloured  (home colouring) Do you really think I'd prioritise that over this beautiful keyboard! Strokes space bar lovingly.  Realises really shouldn't be writing that.  Tries to delete... delete button stuck.  Darn...........

Spend time with other half
So, I've used up a good couple of evenings ironing, at least 3 writing, so that leaves 2 with the hubby.  Generally spent curled up watching TV if I'm honest.

We try and make the most of the weekends and save our pennies for holidays; but obviously that's the whole family.  Luckily our own parents are fabulous babysitters, so we get the odd date night out too.  Maybe once every couple of months on average, and if we've been good, a weekend away for new year sale shopping.

Do fun stuff with your little ones
I struggle with this one.  On the one hand I do enjoy quality one on one time with them when I get it, and we try to arrange this at the weekends, where one of the girls spends time with my hubby whilst I spend time with the other.  On the other hand they are only 2 years apart so they currently play games together very well.  It's all too tempting to leave them to it when they are playing happily to be honest.  Why should I force my presence into the game when it's not required.

When I do have time with them it's either making a special effort to go the park after school, or we'll bake together at the weekends (great recipe for Banana and Chocolate Chip Muffins here that is good to do with children) or I'll get the 'sticking box' out and we'll cover the table with glitter and coloured paper and make cards.  Particularly fun in the fun up to Christmas!  To be honest most of this is done at weekends.  There just isn't much time in the week after we've got in at 4pm, I've made tea (whilst they happily play games or watch a bit of television before tea) we've eaten tea, gone upstairs for bath (about 6pm ish), brushed teeth (to avoid the teeth monster), read stories (one each minimum), sang the lullaby and tucked up in bed.

Although now I've re-read that paragraph I realise that is 'spending time with them'.  I suppose you have to remember that time spent doing daily tasks can also be enjoyable fun time (as long as they aren't tired and causing trouble when they should be getting their teeth brushed.)  It doesn't have to be specifically 'play'.

Spend time with your family
Ha ha ha ha ha.
Finally recovers from rolling around on the floor laughing.  Do I have time?  Unfortunately not.  In our case my parents live a good 45 minutes drive away.  And my mum doesn't drive.  And to get the train she has to get a bus into town first.  So it's easier for me to go to them.  But my girls are at school or nursery.  So it's tricky.

Quite often though my mum will come up to see us on the train. (She's a superstar)  She'll arrive at 10am and stay until 7pm.  It's a long day for her, so we won't be able to continue doing that indefinitely but it works for now and she probably does it roughly once every couple of months.

In between that we'll all get together for birthdays and Christmas.

Socialise with friends
Ha ha ha ha ha hahahahahahahaha.

Really?
No.
I don't.
Ever
Have
Time.

We try and try to do this better.  The last girls evening out I had was probably 4 months ago now.  I see other mummy friends at the school gate (doesn't that count?).  We are starting to try and organise more Sundays where friends come over and we get to catch up whilst the children play in the garden and we have BBQs.  But it's May; and it's still raining.  The weather is thwarting us.

I am bad at this I know.

I'm sorry everyone.  Really sorry!  

Deep clean your house
Deep clean?
My first response was:
"Never.  Ever.  Oh all right then.  Probably once a year in preparation for everyone coming to ours for Christmas.  We clean it so it looks beautiful for all of a day.  Then Father Christmas visits along with 9 other people and the house is once again back to it's chaotic self."

But then I read this back and it dawned on my that we have a wonderful cleaner come in once a week for two hours to blitz the bathrooms/floors/kitchen etc.  She does more in those two hours than I was managing in a month, so it's well worth it.  We decided that, if I was working part-time, part of my earnings would pay for this so that I have time with the girls when am I off.  It works really well, as when I'm off with the younger (3 years old) each week I get to play games with her and not have to worry about bleaching the toilets or scrubbing the oven.

It's the 'keeping it tidy' bit that we struggle with more!

Do the food shopping
Hubby to the rescue on this one.  He takes one or both of the girls to the supermarket at the weekend.  Usually leaving me with some of that ironing we mentioned earlier.  Click here for great tips to keep them entertained whilst they help you shop!


Do bulk ironing
We covered this one further up.  Either in the evenings after the girls are in bed, or at the weekend when they are getting the shopping.

Sum up
And there we have it.  That's how I find the time.  There are a lot of multi-tasking things I do to crowbar other things in like exercise for example (while brushing my teeth) and beauty (plenty of preparation to reduce the time required in the morning to look acceptable.)  But really I prioritise what I think is important; and that is where we'll all differ.  Some won't iron at all (ATOmum I'm looking at you!) and that is absolutely fine.  Some will spend an hour straightening their hair and that is fine too.  As long as we each, individually, feel we are getting the balance right then each to their own.  Of course if you never, ever play games with your children because you are too busy working/beautifying/cleaning then you may just want to rethink.

Now the rules of the meme go something like this:

1) Please post the rules
2) When answering questions give as much information as possible.   It's all about the finer detail people!
3) Add a quick sum up of your normal week.
4) Leave a comment on Sex, drugs, rocker... and stroller, baby.  This is so we can keep track of the Meme and take a polite nose into everyone else's lives.
5) Tag 3 or more people and link to them on your blog.
6) Link back to whoever tagged you and ensure to let them know how you've got on.

I am pleased to tag:

Libby at Truly Myrtle
Emma at Adventures of an Unfit Mother
Angie at Cakes Photos Life

 as I am intrigued as to how they find the time!  I hope you have the time ladies!? 

The Oxford Reading Tree: Chip & Biff & why I hate them

The Oxford Reading Tree Read At Home collection

I really don't like the Chip and Biff books. 

I was at the stage of mild dislike, where I tolerated them because I could see that my daughter was able to read the ones she brought home from school.

And clearly school were using them as part of their reading scheme, so my first reaction was to trust that they have a plan; a strategy; and that Biff and Chip must somehow play a part in that plan.

However, after my 5 year old brought home "The Magic Key" last night I moved on a stage - straight to hatred. 

She might as well have been reading a list of words to practise her reading.  The story "The Magic Key" is less of a story and more of a vague throwing together of scenes where the cast have a limited vocabulary that generally involves some, or all, of them saying "Oh no".  The gist of this 'story' was that Chip and Biff found a magic key.  They picked it up and it made them shrink.  They picked up a few random objects on the floor (pencil, pin) and marvelled at how heavy they were (at this point I was vaguely interested in why, of all the objects them could find, a sharp pin which was now the size of a sword, should be chosen. I needn't have bothered)  Then they saw the dolls house and tried to get inside.  OK, so far there is some promise of adventure.  They have, after all, a weapon.  But no.  They couldn't get in the house and that 'storyline' was abandoned.  Then a dark shadow scared them. Oh, I thought, somewhat foolishly, here we go, here's the action.  But no.  It was a mouse.  A boring mouse that looked at them and went away again.  And that, dear readers, was the end.

I can't work out where the drama is in that.  I can't work out where there is consideration of plot.  Of a beginning, a middle and an end.  Of conflict and resolution.  Of character development. 

I refuse to accept the answer that "there doesn't need to be any".  Of course there does.  You wouldn't try and teach a child to read by making them read the dictionary.  The reason to learn to read is to be able to experience other worlds, to jump into stories and enjoy them.  And of course, to be able to learn things from non-fiction books, to read newspapers, to read road signs, to communicate.

Children will not get a love of books (actual books, made of paper) or even a love of reading, if this is what they are subjected to.  You wouldn't produce a film with this plot, so why is it acceptable in a book?

I understand that when writing for a reading scheme you are supposed to use a certain batch of words.  What I am less sure on is why?  Why not just read stories; any stories.  The common words, by their very nature, will appear more often and will be picked up quicker due to their repetition.  There will be tricky words, but then again, I'm in my late 30s and still have to occasionally ask what a word means.  

There are hundreds of stories out there that are good stories.  With all the Roald Dahls, Julia Donaldsons, Enid Blytons, A A Milnes, Roger Hargreaves' out there, why oh why oh why do we need this rubbish?

I have a set of these at home gifted from a neighbour who is also a teacher.  Of all the books my girls have these Chip and Biff stories are NEVER selected by them when it's bedtime story time.

I don't know what frustrates me more.  The fact that my daughter has to read this stuff to tick the box in her Reading Record, or that I could write the stories so much better!

What do you think?  Why do teachers use these 'schemes'? Do you use them at home? What are the advantages of this kind of book? I presume there must be some, otherwise someone, somewhere, is making money out of a con.

I'd appreciate your thoughts.  Biscuits at the ready as ever.

Read my thoughts on the teaching of phonetics and the new phonetics test here.

Zumba classes: will you really lose weight?

After my first taste of Zumba classes back in November I've managed to get to a few classes and I'm really enjoying it.

Check out my initial review here.

But it strikes me that there are particular types of exercise class devotee that you don't necessarily want to be stood next too in class!  So I thought I'd outline all the exercise class types I find at my local Zumba class and leave you to decide which you are, which you think I am, and which you'd rather avoid!

The Exercise Class Bully
There are some people who, whether they know it or not, take up TOO MUCH ROOM.  They are generally tall and strong.  Often very toned, but not slight.  They come to class regularly to the extent that they know every single move; but they don't express any joy in taking part.  Determined is their only expression.  Even in a Zumba class, which is supposed to be a laugh, they are stuck in the fierce, 'pound it out', aerobics class frame of mind.  They are not light on their feet, so it hurts..

a lot..

when they step on yours.

They might lose weight in class, but not the most they could, because they just don't let go and enjoy it.  

The Mechanic
These ladies are slight, petite and annoyingly trendy.  They look like mums, but the sort of mum who is at the gym daily, can run around the garden with her boys playing football and still look good.  They appear cool and calm, and their cut off trousers don't make them look shorter or fatter (like they do me), but rather trendy and youthful.

Once they start exercising they don't let loose and relax, but neither do they pound out the steps.  They seem to do it daintily.  The steps are technically right, but it doesn't look like they'd ever break a sweat doing them.  It's mechanical.  Dancers would refer to it as 'marking'.

The Tryer
These are often older, maybe mid 50s, though not exclusively.  They are not natural movers and can't quite keep up.  You often find yourself nose to nose with them when you turn around and they don't.  You need to keep an eye out for them to ensure you don't tread on them.

But they don't give up.  They are there every week. They meet up with friends at class and enjoy the social aspect.

Again, they don't let themselves go.  Rather they always look slightly worried; as if they are going to be sent to the Headteachers office for doing it wrong.

OTT (Over the top) Show-Off
This is the one that turns up erratically, but picks up the moves quickly and so just has a laugh.  If she goes wrong she just laughs and catches up at the next count of 8.  She throws herself into the moves and has a tendency to use up far too much room, but will keep an eye on the space around her and try not to get in the way.

She's clearly done dance classes before and thinks it means she's an expert, but really she's just not committed enough and should just get out of the way so the rest of us true exercise devotees can get down to serious work.

Ironically she'll probably be the one to burn off the most calories leaping around like a nightclub raver.

***

Most exercise classes have something in common.  They will only work if you relax, stop worrying about what you may or may not look like and throw yourself into it. 

Remember Phoebe in the US show 'Friends'? Remember how she used to run like a child and just 'let go'?

Remember dancing in nightclubs as an 18 year old?  How much energy did you throw into those moves?  Remember that and recreate it.  It's your time.  Enjoy it.  Then you really will find yourself losing weight.

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So what do you think?  Which are you? Which am I? Which would you like to be?

Doubting your own self-worth?

Those of you who follow me on twitter (@ymummyreally) and on facebook may have noticed that I've been feeling a little down in the dumps since Wednesday night, when the cold/virus/joint aching/sore throat/high temperature thing that my children both enjoyed over the bank holiday weekend was lovingly passed on to me.

I fell to sleep at 7.30pm on the sofa on Wednesday night.  That's right!  7.30!  Boy, am I a wuss!  And yes I expect lots of sympathetic comments and virtual biscuits sent over.  (pretty please - bottom lip comes out)

The advantage of feeling rubbish for the last 24 hours has been plenty of time to think.  Oh no! Think? That's not good is it?  My parents always tell me I over-think everything.  Over analyse it all.  Feel like I need to have mapped out all the possibilities, internally debated all the arguments, considered all the outcomes, before doing ANYTHING.

Tea always makes things better

They are right.  I've been thinking about my next blog post and I've been stuck.  This is partly because I found out today that I didn't make the finalist list in The Mad Blog Awards 2012.  As a result I went straight into 'over-analyse' mode.  I sat and spent far too much time, in an already weakened state, reading the 'finalists' blogs.  The idea being that I should be able to pick up some tips to help improve this humble blog and therefore provide you lovely readers with some really great stuff.

I'm sure you can see where this is going can't you?  On a normal, healthy day that plan would be fine.  I'd have a read, enjoy the fantastic blogs that they are (they really are, click on the Mad Blog link above and check them out - but please do come back... whimpers) and use the lessons to build the joy here.  What actually happened was that I got over-emotional, over-awed at these other writers, many of whom have been doing this for years, and felt completely not worthy.  There were even tears.

It was stupid, stupid, stupid.

And so I sat down to write.  Though this post doesn't particularly stick to the main theme of this blog (tips to help us be yummy, even when a mummy) it is to remind me that we are ALL yummy in our own ways.  We have our own skills, our own talents, and, maybe more importantly, our own joys.

I've been writing this blog for 3 years now (has it really been that long) and this will be my 165th published post.  I didn't write it to make money (though if offered that would obviously be nice).  I started it because I've always wanted to be a writer.  I wanted to write.  I wanted to hopefully create something that someone somewhere would find useful or mildly amusing, and I will keep doing that regardless of potential awards, because it is here, with you, that I find my moments of joy.

So thank you for stopping by.  Please stay for biscuits.  Comments and feedback are definitely welcome (I always reply). Above all, stay yummy - it's not just a looks thing; it's a state of mind.*

*good job really - failing at the looks thing!

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